Douchebags and... Shit.

Wiku (5:48) :
What the hell is a douchebag? I mean what it really means? Wasn't it a medical term in the first place? Like when the doctors douche rectums, all that shit goes into a douchebag or something.
Jacobus (5:50) :
Yes, something like that. The most accurate meaning for the term is a colostectomy bag, an external plastic pouch that collects the feces of those without a currently functioning lower intestine.
Jacobus (5:50) :
Pardon me, colostomy bag. The intestine need not be entirely removed, just not be functional.

I don't want to know how he knows stuff like this.

But I tell you what I know... Shit is awful. Especially when it clings to your asshairs... I have told about this before, haven't I? Of course I have. But isn't it odd that after millions years of evolution, we humans, or even animals don't have a good, easy and most importantly CLEAN way to drop our faces? Why in earth the asshole has to be in our ASS? Ass has hairs and shit... I know animals, except lizards and frogs have fur everywhere, but I think it'd be much more suitable to have the asshole in our heels! Imagine that. No more crouching, no more strange seats with a hole, and no more sore legs and busted veins for pushing so hard! All the toilets would be nothing more than a hole in the floor. You just press your heel on the hole and push the shit out.

Better yet, why the shit doesn't come in packages? Like eggs or something. Sometimes the shit gets just too big, so having it in a tough shell would be a much better solution. You wouldn't have to wipe your ass anymore! I mean heels! Perhaps in another million years of evolution we have a human who shits eggs from his heel.

Pardon the numerous grammatical errors, but my english just ain't good at 6 am. I should go to sleep.